we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
