I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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