I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
