I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
