the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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