you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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