..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
