What tipped you off? The sombrero?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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