Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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