How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm bleeding and have questions
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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