apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
The uberlube is also flammable
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
