are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
