Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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