My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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