Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Hippo gnu deer
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
