If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Randomize