i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Is that strawberry winking at me??
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
