Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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