He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize
