Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
