Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
