Sponge bath it is.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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