Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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