What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
