why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I am naked and annoyed.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
