Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Randomize