omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
