ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
