Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
