you have to choose: penises or morals?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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