you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
