Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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