butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
