whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Randomize
