he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
