Is it normal to miss your booty call?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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