Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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