Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
We are all done wearing pants today
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
