Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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