Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize