guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
