Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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