Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I want a musical about memes.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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