Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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