He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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