So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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