My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
