If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
