That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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