I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so thatβs how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize