Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
